For Once
by Witchy Bee
Summary: In which for once the snow is real; he knows more about the future than River does; there is a problem the Doctor can't fix; Donna is the most important person in the room. A series of drabbles.
1. Snow

**A/N: **Basically a short series of short drabbles. If you're wondering when the next chapter of Awake will be up, I can tell you this: soon. Very soon. I've already got bits of it written in my notebook.

**Title:** Snow

**Pairing:** Rose/Ten

)O(

For once it is snowing. Not just the fallen ashes from a destroyed spaceship, but real winter snow, quieting the world all around. And the cold feels good. His insides are nearly boiling now with both radiation and regenerative energy. He knows the damage can't be repaired, and he won't be able to delay the inevitable for much longer. He's already starting to cook. This is it, then. His final reward.

A sudden sharp pain catches him off guard. Oh yeah, dying hurts. He is falling apart and he can't keep quiet anymore.

"You all right, mate?" Rose. His compassionate, extraordinary Rose. The woman who took pity on a Dalek and somehow found the patience to stay with him even though he was - is - a broken, bitter, selfish man.

"Yeah," he lies through his teeth. He lies because it's so easy, and she wouldn't understand if he told her the truth. Too early in her timeline. Honestly, he hadn't meant to talk to Rose at all, just see her one last time. _I don't want to stop being your Doctor._

"Too much to drink?"

"Something like that."

"Maybe it's time you went home," she says.

"Yeah..." Except where is home now, really?

"Anyway, happy New Year!"

"And you." She turns to go, but he doesn't want her to walk away yet. He doesn't want that to be the end, so he calls after her: "What year is this?"

"Blimey, mate, how much have you had?" Rose laughs. Oh, how he has missed the sound of her laugh. "It's 2005, January the 1st."

Of course, 2005. This is the year it all changes for her. These are the days before living plastic, the end of the world (worst first date idea ever) and before Rose Tyler met the universe. For a moment he envies his past self, with all that still to come in the future.

"Tell you what, I bet you're gonna have a really great year." And he hopes she does. Or did. _Was it great, Rose Tyler? Was it the best? Was it fantastic?_

"Yeah?" she smiles. It's almost enough to keep him going. He could be brave forever if it made her smile. "See ya."

It isn't a tearful goodbye on a beach in Norway, and maybe this is better. Rose runs home through the snow. The Doctor goes to his death, alone again.


	2. Darillium

**Title: **Darillium

**Pairing:** River/Eleven

)O(

For once he knows something about the future that River doesn't, and it's killing him.

No, actually, the worst part is it's not; it's killing her.

He is standing on her doorstep in the rain and he doesn't want to do this.

Tomorrow she will sacrifice her life for the Doctor, even though she'll be a stranger to him by then. He hates this backwards, timey wimey way the universe has crossed their paths. He's already seen the end. Maybe River won't exactly die, but he is still going to lose her all the same, just like the Ponds and everyone else foolish enough to love him.

"You cut your hair," she observes, smiling. "And that's a new suit. What's the occasion?"

_I know this is how it happened_, he thinks. _You told me. Or you will. Because it's happening now._ "Can't I take my wife somewhere special for no reason?"

"Hmm. I suppose..."

He sets the coordinates for Darillium, because he knows it has to be here. It has to be tonight. Their last night. River marvels at the planet's beauty, but he's looking at her. He never wants to stop. Why can't they run away from this like everything else? He desperately wishes he could tell her not to go to the Library. He can't, of course. Their timelines are so knotted up and hopelessly entangled that pulling even one thread might very well cause the whole tragic thing to unravel.

_"Time can be rewritten!"_

_"Not those times. Not one line."_ Her words._ "Don't you dare."_

So he vows to give River Song the best last night possible. After all, he already knows she'd had a wonderful time watching the Singing Towers. The Towers do sing beautifully, and Darillium's moons shine bright across the purple water. River holds his hand. When she looks over at her husband, she notices a few stray tears begin to roll down his cheeks. She can tell it isn't the music making him cry.

"Oh, sweetie. What's wrong?"

The Doctor turns his gaze towards her, and then makes a noise in his throat somewhere between a laugh and a sob before replying:

"Spoilers."


	3. Can't

**Title: **Can't**  
Pairing: **Amy/Rory...sort of.**  
A/N:** Takes place between the last Pond Life and Asylum of the Daleks.

)O(

For once in as long as the Doctor cares to remember, there is a problem he can't fix, but he wouldn't be the Doctor if he didn't try.

Amy Pond hears a knock at the door and quickly attempts to dry her tears. She's been crying for what feels like hours. Of course time doesn't matter anymore, now that Amy's soon to be ex-husband has moved out and her best friend is gone, too. Who could possibly be at the door?

"Rory?" she asks hopelessly, trying to keep her voice from shaking.

"Ah, no, actually. It's me. It's the Doctor," comes a familiar and very welcome voice. "I'm here to help. You're still connected with the TARDIS via telepathic link, and she informed me you might need my help. So of course I came straight away. I don't know if the timing's right; the message wasn't very clear. Probably should have phoned first. Could you open the door, please?"

Amy throws the door open without another moment's thought and practically collapses into his arms, crying once more. "Oh, Doctor..."

Not happy tears. Definitely not.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong?" The Doctor rubs her back soothingly, albeit somewhat awkwardly as well. "It's okay, Amelia. Shh...I've got a great idea. Why don't you sit down and I'll make you a nice cup of tea? Then maybe you can tell me what happened." She clings to him at first, not wanting to let go, still sobbing breathlessly.

The Doctor notices this and remembers humans need a lot of air to live. "Breathe, Pond."

)O(

Amy is sitting at her kitchen table, blankly staring into an untouched mug of hot tea. The Doctor leans comfortably against the edge of the counter, waiting for her to say something. He's concerned. He has never seen her like this before. Not his brave little Amy Pond.

"I don't know where to start."

"Well, then start with the obvious," he tells her quietly. "Where's Rory?"

"I gave him up." Surprisingly she does not cry again, but instead looks at him, and the Doctor can't help but frown when he sees how red and tired her eyes are. "He's gone. We're getting a divorce."

The Doctor nearly chokes on his tea. He finds himself speechless, which is very rare, as his highly advanced alien brain struggles to accept this impossible information. The words divorce and Ponds just don't exist in the same sentence. Something has to be wrong with the universe. Amy and Rory always have to be okay. He hasn't felt this scared since Midnight; he is more helpless now than when all of his enemies allied to imprison him in the Pandorica while everything exploded.

"Why?"

She shakes her head. "It doesn't matter."

"How can you say that? It matters! Everything matters, and it very well may be the most important thing ever. Okay, okay...Amelia Pond, don't you worry. I can fix this. I will fix this!"

"You can't," Amy insists. "This isn't like saving the world in twenty minutes or rebooting the universe. There's no invasion. It's just...real life. We had problems you can't save us from, Doctor. You can't sonic it all better this time and we can't keep running away."

What sort of problems could they overcome? It's not like their timelines are reversed or a parallel world was keeping them apart. They are the Ponds, they are human and they can do anything.

"No, but I am very good at talking and I've been known to listen, too. The only miracle I've ever witnessed brought Rory back to you from nonexistence. _You_did that, Amy. It was all your extraordinary mind. The most human act of devotion I've ever seen was when a plastic Roman waited for two thousand sleepless years, guarding the woman he loved. And I warned him it was a stupid thing to do, but he wouldn't be swayed because he wanted to keep you safe. There are few things I'm absolutely certain of, and one of them is that you two love each other. Impossible love like yours does not deserve to be given up over something which, according to you, doesn't matter! Wait," he stops speaking abruptly, and she recognizes his expression immediately. He has noticed. "Hang on...You said you gave him up. What did you mean?"

"I don't know."

"Don't lie to me, Pond. Those were your exact words. Not 'I kicked him out,' but 'I gave him up.' implying unwillingness or regret." He is right in front of her now. "Why, Amy?"

"I don't know!"

"Yes, you do. Tell me."

Amy draws a deep breath, swears on all her Scottishness that she will not cry anymore, looks him in the eye and says: "Trust me, Raggedy Man, you really don't want to know why and there is nothing you can do. We're grown-ups and we can handle this ourselves, all right? Please, just this once, don't."

"You're protecting me." The Time Lord looks away from her, sighs and then murmurs the words she feared he would. "Oh, Amelia...this is all my fault, isn't it?"


	4. Important

**Title:** Important

**Pairing:** Sort of mentioned Rose/Ten

)O(

For once people are gonna be looking at her, and they will smile and say how pretty the bride is; even Mum will have to be proud this day. Donna Noble has always known she's no one important. Just a temp, that's all. But for one shining moment as she walks down the aisle with her head held high and everyone watching, she will be special. The single most important person in the whole universe, in fact.

Was it really too much to ask? Just one day when someone notices her?

Apparently so, because one moment she's in the church, literally glowing, and the next Donna is standing on a spaceship (in space!) with no idea where she is or what's happening. And oh, she's in her wedding dress and Donna is supposed to be getting married right now, but instead there's this strange man gawking at her like she can't be real. The entire situation seems completely unfair. Donna is confused and furious, so she takes it out on him, later regretting it since none of this is actually his fault and if she'd thought about someone other than herself, Donna might have noticed that the alien looked like he had been crying recently.

He mentions a friend he lost. Really, she should be able to put the pieces together immediately. Perhaps they're both a little wrapped up in their own worlds.

So she doesn't notice. Not that the Doctor wants to talk about it; he gladly welcomes a distraction, in fact, even if she is a bit bossy and rude. So is he, for that matter. But she's also ginger, which is quite unfair. It occurs to the Doctor that one reason he likes her so much is because she doesn't remind him of Rose at all. Donna is loud and thoroughly unimpressed by his time machine or how clever he can be. Although he does wish she would stop calling him a Martian.

Donna Noble is truly brilliant. He offers her the universe, because he honestly doesn't think he can handle being alone again. She declines. Another thing to add to her growing list of regrets. But she won't forget him. This impossible, sad man with ancient eyes who changed how she views the world and her place in it. She will do so much. People will never forget Donna Noble.

"Promise me one thing," she says. "Find someone."

She can tell he needs a friend to hold his hand and stop him when he gets carried away. Donna Noble can't be that person. Not yet. She has a lot of thinking to do. Try to put her life back in order, maybe travel the world. But she hopes one day to see him again.

"Your friend, the one you lost, what was her name?"

"Her name was Rose."


End file.
